So many times, we fall vicitm
planning for the future because  you're so much in love
you're too blind to see that life is unpredictable
and the happenings in life are not controlled by man
let everything fall into place..
Learn to love... bt live an open life ...........

Times like this when you feel so alone

You seek for joy’s embrace

But sadness makes your heart it’s resting place

You wish for so many things

Things you wish you never did

You wish to undo that which ones brought you so much happiness but now pain it brings

You question the life you’ve chosen to led

You question all your choices and decisions

You hope to God for only the right choices is that you wanna make

You got so many questions to ask but you struggle

The good begets the evil which has taken hold of you

Raptured your heart and sealed it with so much confusion

I beg for mercy!

This feeling is killing

TeddY Love

My train of thought is hard to follow
my mind wonders so faraway
even I can't stop
my thoughts are clouded
focused on just one
which the brightest smile in me
he brings
my heart's merry for
this love is pure
never felt this way.
Where my all I wanna give.
You reach the depth of my soul with your smile
the far ends of my heart feels the heat
for the warmth of ur love
keeps my heartbeat
so many times I fought with love
but this time it's held me bound
bound to a life of peace,
adoration, care, affection and LOVE
my heart's one cry
is for this twined life of ours to end a fairytale
show the power of love
pull through the tides of life
pressing through love's turmoils and pain
surpassing the crys of the heart
and sealing it with the passion to stay strong in love.

Reasons to appreciate family

You never know the worth of what you've got until
you see it slipping away from you
and all you can do is watch
because you can't do anything more ..
You never know the worth of a person
until they're no longer there
to make fun of your silliness
make fun of the way you speak
scold you for your wrong doings
give you a hug and tell you they love you
You would never know the worth of dad
until you are left alone to fix the things
he wouldn't let his princess do
until you need him to smile at you and be your rock
until you need him to put you in the right path
Appreciate what you've got .. Appreciate what you have
cause time lost with those who care the most about you
especially family.. is time lost forever
Because the love of your parents, siblings- immediate and extended is overwhelming when experienced ...

I love my dad, mum siblings... extended family ..
I've been showered with so much love and care from birth
and I'm appreciative because it's made me the happy person I am today!!..

Never been so scared of losing anything like I was today ... Bt I thank God for life!!!!.. :)...

hey.. it's funny how so many people read my blog but I can't see any comment or likes
from anyone of you.. anyway .... I've gt one noteI do not think I would
ever post it .. it's gonna be a struggle.. buhhhhhhh.. oh well we'll see hw it goes.. :)...

another thought

My thought on the 23/07/2012

Walking on eggshells around you
why place them there?...
you opened yourself first to love
now love you shut out!...
still tryina get what this is all about

last time!

I felt this way this week .buhhhh it's all gone with the wind!!!!!!.. forever!!!!!!... ...

Oh for one i know I'm not perfect 
Not a perfect woman 
With a perfect heart 
Nor do i have a perfect smile
 or perfect thought 
You've taken me just the way I am
"Just a lady"
 Even in my darkest moments
 You stand firm
 You hold me close so much
 I feel our hearts twined!
 You hear my every word 
And with your all you bring help
You radiate love
 I feel enraptured as i dwell in my thoughts of you
 I push you away yet you draw me neigh
 I go faraway yet you find me
 Like one who's lost that with makes him whole that's what you are
 My heart this day yearns to reach perfection just for you 
My soul crys for the peace I once knew 
My spirit calls for your smile which sets dat pedestal of joy in my heart
 This time my love would flow like the gentle wind.. 
Reach out to you and keep you for me
 My eyes would not water for i know you'll stay beside me 
I plead for God's love to touch this heart of mine
 Heal it and bring me fully to you
 Because you are the best 
And my best is all I want to give!..

Just something before I go to bed.. dnt really knw if it's true to you.. bt... Oh well.. :)

The amount of energy it takes to keep someone totally out of your thoughts is the same energy used to breathe in and out .. because as you breathe, you live ..... you think of that same person and wish he or she is there with you... It takes more to breathe at this time cause ur heart is heavy ... holding the thoughts of one you hold close and exerting much pressure as the heart beats!... Right now I cannot explain how I feel but I sure know something is missing... One thing I must do is look within and search for that which adds that glow to my smile and causes my heart to beat in peace. That no amount of sadness or bitterness can penetrate!... I want to be happy in all aspects.... Yes.. It's only a matter of time!...because everyone deserves true happiness.

NOW

Pardon my chit chat today.... but this is how I feel this very moment ......

Now this is a week I choose to stand for that which is true, I have battled with thoughts which have held me bound... Battled with happiness which has brought me so much tears .. Struggled which peace which has meddled with my joy and has again hurt others... Today... I stand firm.. I wanna take hold of things .. I would call on God daily as him alone knows what I want in life ... Atimes I wish I know God's plan for my future!.. I wouldn't bother which things!.. Yet I want him to have his way this very moment..... Woke up this morning with different thoughts in my head .. my mind wandering.. Yes wandering as I feel like a stranger to my own self... this is a week of self realisation .... Of course I knw what I need in live the now .. True happiness .. Only the way to go about it is what I want to know.... That's where God comes to play ... I have heard the words of wisdom everyone has for me... This day I hope I take my hold of my happiness and I know sound mind and voices of confusion playing in my head would seize!... I would play a song of joy as I would overcome all interfering thoughts ........even as I now walk in the path of silencing voices!.... .

I wonder

When it feels like there's a struggle
Atimes it comes naturally
Atimes you feel lost
You want to let it out
But wonder oncemore if it's right
Your heart still is split
It wanders...
I wonder if all this would end
If one day one would firmly silence the voices
Voices within far from my reach
Voices within I can't control
So many questions I can't bear to answer
For I know with one answer comes another thought
Too scared to let go... Fear's not mine yet
in this heart of mine ... it's resting place has it made
Still I wonder as it feels right atimes
But is it really right??.....

God's help

This is not one of my confused notes .. jst a plea to God ...In his wisdom.. I need his touch .... don't understand what my life's gonna be like in years to come

With one decision I make ..
several choices are made open to me ...
God!!!... I do not want to do this without you
I have neglected you
pushed you aside
gone astray
taken control of my life.
this one thing I have done
I know would haunt my everyday
I do not regret
yet I feel guilty
I come back to you oh Lord
Help me make the right choices .... hmmmmm

NOW....

Feels like a  part of me just died
and another sprout
My life has been a puzzle
A love puzzle
One confusion made it's place of rest
And I struggled with fears
Still I struggle to free myself
Bt slowly I give in to love
Open my heart and let love do it's magic.......

hmmmmmmmm...........

You don't wanna be overbearing
neither would u wanna be a pain
all to show you care
be natural
true to urself
no false pretence
cos life leads you to different places where
you need to stay constant
no attitude change
no change of belief!
Just stay true to who you are
all everything would fall in place for you ...

Jst a quick thought .....

,,,,,,,I just realised

u may love so many other guyz
meet so many amazing people..
But your first love would always hold that
special place in your heart
you may nt want to be together again
but thoughts of how he/she opened your eyes to love
just makes you smile
Love is magical ...
I wanna love again ......

.........................#######................................

You know atimes I think  to myself
I do not deserve all the affection, love and care showered on me
I am surrounded by amazing people
People who love and care about me
people who treasure me
that it seems so unreal to me
but it is real
not in anyway making an artistic writing
just need to understand how to deal with so much love
and not hurt anyone
because my llife right now
hmmmmmm........
just at a stage where
I feel like running away from my own self
and getting someone else
to deal with this drama
I am caught between two walls
I NEED YOUR WISDOM OH LORD!.....

Life now

At a point in life
every guy you meet
says the same thing-
all wanna show affection
seranade you with sweet words
The truth seems so close
yet faraway.
Dialy you go on your kneels
pray the prayer of wisdom
"Oh Lord I need your wisdom"
your heart is torn
you feel troubled
you wonder why all the good words come at once
kind gestures, love, care and affection
you ponder on the words you hear
you worry for a mistake is costly
The right path you want to follow
tears you want faraway from you.
You crave peace!
Truely if that which is meant to give you peace
causes that heart of yours to worry
then it's not yours -MOVE ON!
For once I found joy, peace, happiness, friendship wrapped in one
but walls in strategic places robbed me one time of true happiness....

J'TAIME

Comme un virus que vous avez répandu

mangé profondément dans mon coeur

le seul bruit de mon nom

car il laisse vos lèvres tend la main à mon âme

faire déplacer au

le seul bruit de votre voix

Vous m'avez profondément infectée par la fièvre

Seulement curable par votre amour

nos cœurs sont fixés

Même que je regarde dans tes yeux

Mon cœur se fond.

L'impression que mon parfait inconnu

A une fois de plus me balayé mes pieds

Maintenant, la sensation de vos mains dans les miennes

Me conduit tout le chemin

Causer ce sourire n'a pas de prix

Oh les choses que votre ferait pour moi ... je sais

La façon dont je me sens en sachant que je vous vois

Oubliant les mers qui crée cette distance

Je sollicite votre présence

 

 

I love you

Like a virus you've spread
eaten deep into my heart
the mere sound of my name
as it leaves your lips reaches out to my soul
causing it to move at
the mere sound of your voice
You have infected me with deep fever
Only curable by your love
our hearts are fixed
Even as I gaze into your eyes
My heart melts.
Feels like my perfect stranger
Has once more swept me off my feet
Now the feel of your hands in mine
Leading me all the way
Causing that priceless smile
Oh the things your would do for me ... I know
The way I feel knowing I will see you
Forgetting the seas that creates that distance
I crave your presence

I heard........

You can never test the love one has for you
unless you give it a chance
You can never fall in love unless you release your heart
you can never stop hurting unless you address the cause
You can never smile unless it's triggered by goodness
How can I smil? love? stop hurting?
#QuestionExisting

???

So many things I wanna do
So many things I wanna say
Do not know if it's just me
For my thoughts oncemore
They play on me
Feels like my heart was never made for this
I look into the future
And hope for the best
That which I seek like manna
wouldn't fall from heaven
The heart to try
The heart to fall in love
Th heart to show love
Would I ever let go?

Do I really?

I know what I want
But shadows becloud what I need
Setting my mind to wonder
About things I know
Why give in?
Allow thoughts to hold me?
I possess my mind
Yet feels like it's owned by others

quick thought

Why put yourself in a box
why make yourself unhappy
why think of things you cannot change?
Why stay negative?
so many questions I ask myself
then I realised we are the soul architect of our problems
we know the best ways to  make ourselves unhappy
We upset ourselves with flimsy worries
either we want too much from life
or we are not putting in as much into life
Once I asked myself this question
"Am I living or existing?"
Learn to live each day as it comes
live life with meaning
live life happily
so many things in life we can't control.
change in life is inevitable
so... why worry?
As humans, staying positive is not our strongest point
you may get to a point where you feel you can't push yourself any further
you may reach that stage where you feel like giving up
why not pause for a sec.............
think about life and the worth of whatever it is you are fighting for
is it worth it?
You need to keep the faith
and live your life
cos only the living live life.. :P... hehehe

Mere thoughts of mine .. :)...

The word

My heart rattled about with fear
my thoughts left me empty
my world wrapped in worry
my joy tied by hate
then the word came
set the spark in my heart
triggered me to move
brought me to a place of peace
the peace within I can't explain
now joy has found it's resting place

Praising the Almighty

 

Looking out to the brighter skies

all I can do is give thanks

Observing nature and its beauty,

Unmerited favour your grace

his awesomeness is revealed.

It's that eminent man above

with ravishing glamour.

 

An almighty being

great in architecture

designer of life

planner of destiny.

Indeed a wonderful craftsman

maker of heaven and earth in beauty and splendour

 

Wonderful is minute

Beautiful is demeaning

Magnificient is a mere word

Adoring is restrictive

His power is ultimate

Resounding praise is all he desires

 

The word of an orator

that falls like droplets of finest waters

Enclosing piece of him

that envelops like the bubbling clear wind.

For his wisdom

that surpasses human understanding

echoes of praises to him must be heared.

 

At the verge of pain

his healing power comes like a soothing balm

At the start of torment

his mercy flows like gushing wind.

At  the time of abject rejection

his love runs with arms opened wide

 

So why not give all the worship

give all the thanks

give al the honour

give all the praise

to the ever wonderful father

Indeed God answers praise   

 

:(

I could hate the faces around me
Same faces every single day
i could jump at the idea of going faraway
Away from those faces
First day I bless God for being far
Two days to the final day I weep!
Boredom has found its resting place with me
My hearts troubled
As same people I run from I wanna be with
I can only phanthom what it feels like being in a place u call your own
Surrounded by the people who mean the world to you
Distance stands no chance in love
Yes! With joy i stayed away bt now in pain, time keeps me from being with them
For i must wait for that last day!
My heart weeps for freedom!
Abit of fresh air, help clear my thoughts for now! That which truely troubles my heart I search for and yet cannot find.

What would you say?

Say no to the devil
when he torments your soul
Say no to the devil
when he pricks your heart
With genuine repentance from sin
The devil ain't gat nothing on you
Say yes to the peace of God which comes like a calm wind
And like a soothing balms heals that
battered heart of yours
Let God be your judge and pluck the
accusing finger of satan and his cohorts
The blood that was shed for you on the cross
of Calvary has washed you clean of all iniquity and has purified your heart
Let him who accuses one who the Lord has
has set free be the accused
Embrace the peace
welcome the freedom
And let happiness be rekindled in your life.

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The very best-My mother

I would not cease

to speak of one

whose love is

evident in every area of my life

Whose smile even

in my deepest worries

brightens my day

Whose words

cuts deep and gets me thinking

Who out of

her very little

gives me more

You are my MOTHER

and there can be no other

from the depths of my heart

where the best in me sits

I wish you a very happy mother's day

because you deserve the words I say.

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Wait

I would wait for you

Yes I need that strength to wait for you

Too many things happening still

my heart belongs to you

I am but human

My eyes heed to the

Sparkles I see around

My all yearns for love which I find with you

This love makes me feel lost

Feels like I've never felt such goodness in life

I stand amazed at this

Wandering if this is real

sudden boldness I have when our hearts speak

I fear!

Perfection is not for me

No idea what this would bring

Still I ask for God grace in this wait

Cos I really wanna wait for you

Now, admist my weakness

Show me my strength.

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Fairytale?

"Why is  life not a fairytale ?"
Atimes I imagine myself in this romantic movie where the beautiful lady goes through so much heart ache and ends up with the man she loves.. where the man reveals how much he loves the lady and gives her this hug which makes her feel so secure...

still in that moment,....

slowly they pull apart and the guy with his blue eyes color like the sky and lady with eye like hazel sparkling like the stars...

The attraction pulls them together and slowly the guy pulls her close with lips touching and locked in the most mind bubbling, heart warming and soul binding kiss which creates the most beautiful atmosphere where even the the sun heats at the sight...

Fireworks exploding and beautiful memories replaying...

All from that  single moment...

Just a mere wish but truely lets face it life is no fairytale...
Savour the magical moment in your head as life is no movie.... I'll retrace my steps back to reality.

CHOICE

Woke up this morning feeling so emotional.. My heart was heavy I could hardly speak!.. I promise you when I had finished writing this my head became less cramped and my heart was relieved of it's heaviness.

Maybe I need someone to take your place

Maybe I hate feeling this way...

I can't help but dream!..

I've longed for the day I'll be yours and you be mine!

Like two heart walking side by side,

Holding hands.

Again and again I feel detached from you

I hate being the fool...My greatest fear!

Do I play the fool one last time and get the answer I seek?

It can only be love

Fused my heart with yours

Creating that spark when the energy's high

Causing my heart to skip beats....

Yet I stay alive

My tummy rumbles at the idea

Yet hunger's far from me

One thing!.. I either be the fool one last time

Or languish in my pool of tears.